“The Bachelor” Week 7 Recap: Time to Meet the Parents at Hometowns
We finally get to see the people who created all of these crazy Bachelor ladies (
I know I'm like two days late but I don't have cable I'm sorry).
Hannah Ann, Kelsey, Madison, and Victoria F. are the only girls left, and it's time for Peter to meet their parents.
Hometown #1 - Hannah Ann
Hannah Ann takes Peter axe throwing in her hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee so she can prove to her dad that Peter is not a total wuss. Peter is really bad at axe throwing and...looks like a total wuss.
He writes Hannah Ann a letter of all the things he likes about her (like she did last week), and she takes this middle school move as a sign that he loves her.
They head to dinner with her parents, and everyone in the house is already sobbing — except for Hannah Ann's dad, who is clearly trying to murder Peter with his eyes.
Peter sits down with her dad and tells him that he is falling in love with Hannah Ann. Her dad freaks out and basically tells Peter not to say anything to Hannah Ann unless he is absolutely sure of it.
Despite the fact that he already said he's falling in love with Madison, Peter tells Hannah Ann the same thing anyway.
She tells Peter that she is in love with him (very different from falling, in this universe) and they make out while he forces her say it over and over. Gross.
Hometown #2 - Kelsey
Peter and Kelsey go to make their own wine in Des Moines, Iowa. It's actually a really cute date. And they two of them get pretty drunk, which always makes for good screen time.
Kelsey tells Peter that she loves him. They make out. Peter's face literally looks like a tomato from all the alcohol.
At dinner, Kelsey tells her whole family that she wants to marry Peter. Peter tells Kelsey's mom that "his heart has fallen" for her...which means absolutely nothing.
Hometown #3 - Madison
Madison takes Peter to play basketball at Auburn University, her alma mater (how good would it be if Hannah B. came back right now for a Auburn-Alabama showdown?).
Peter, like the axe throwing, is not very good at basketball.
We get an aside with Madison and learn that she doesn't even know if she is falling in love with Peter yet!! I sense another fence-jumping in our near future.
They go to meet the parents and have a wholesome family dinner. Madison's parents are sketched out by Peter:
- Peter: I'm falling in love with your daughter.
- Madison's dad, probably: F*ck.
Madison reveals that she's so hesitant about Peter because she is still a virgin...Peter doesn't know that.
He, on the other hand, is not hesitant, and goes so far as to tell the cameras that he loves Madison.
You aren't supposed to do that yet Peter, at least let us think the other girls have a chance.
Hometown #4 - Victoria F.
The pair heads to a private Hunter Hayes concert at Virginia Beach a la the Chase Rice Scandal.
Hunter is also singing the song "I Want Crazy," which I think perfectly describes their relationship.
But somehow, at this private concert, Peter's ex randomly shows up. With her face blurred out, she tells Peter that Victoria F. is basically a homewrecker and that he should dump her. It's shady af, get outta here, blurry girl.
Peter confronts Victoria about it outside of her parents' house. She freaks out, and once again, runs away crying.
They have the world's most unproductive conversation, and Peter leaves in a car before even meeting her parents. Their future is not looking good.
Peter decides to keep Hannah Ann, Madison, and...VICTORIA FREAKIN' F.
The one he didn't even go on a real hometown date with because she's too insane.
He sends the perfectly normal Kelsey home, right after their adorable date.
Peter is officially the worst and I hate him. You were robbed, Kelsey. Robbed.
Quotes of the Night
- "Can you honestly sit here and tell me tonight that it's not just a flash in a pan?"
- "I'm going to name our bottle of wine 'Wine'."
Next week, Madison gives Peter an ultimatum about sleeping with the other girls...which will make the Fantasy Suites difficult. Grab the wine and stay tuned.