"The Bachelorette" Week 2 Recap: The Men Strip Down for Dodgeball

The tension goes up and the clothes come down when Clare initiates a testosterone-fueled strip dodgeball game that leaves the men feeling exploited (~~I know I'm like two days late but I don't have cable I'm sorry~~).

Don't get too excited, ladies. The episode kicks off with a fully-clothed group date.

Group Date #1 - Love Languages

Clare decides that this week's first group date is going to be every man's worst nightmare: a live-action demonstration of four of the five love languages.

First up is "words of affirmation." Clare sits in a literal tower à la Romeo and Juliet while the guys all spew out some generic speech about how they can't wait to fall in love with her.

Clare gets a baseball and a chess piece during the "gifts" section, and then we get to watch five minutes of steamy blindfolded hugging to represent "physical touch."

The drama begins when the group goes back to the resort for "quality time." Clare sits on the couch anxiously waiting for the men to jump at a chance to hang out with her and...none of them do.

Clare freaks out and yells at all of the men for ignoring her. After a few seconds of awkward silence, Dale saves the day and takes Clare to go make out.

Making out isn't enough this time though. After Riley apologizes to Clare and pulls her in for a silent slow dance, she gives him the rose.

One on One - Jason

Clare picks Jason for the season's first on One on One, and decides that their first date will be an intense therapy session.

Clare forces Jason to write down all of the things he hates about himself. After telling Clare that he's manipulative, unable to love, and insecure, she sees it as a great sign that he's able to open up.

Next, they each read each other letters to their younger selves that are really dark. The date is awkward, but I won't lie — it's refreshing to see Jason be vulnerable about his anxiety.

Clare thinks so too, and she gives him the rose before they go off to burn her dress from the Juan Pablo finale.

Group Date #2 - Strip Dodgeball

For the second group date, Clare, a fully-grown 39-year old woman, decides to make the men play an extremely degrading game of strip dodgeball.

The red team wins, so they get to spend the evening with Clare. The blue team, wearing only their thongs (maybe even less?), shamefully walk back to the resort.

All is well at the after party until blue team Blake decides to crash the evening to steal Clare away. The other guys get mad, and Clare not only sends him back to the resort, but physically denies his kiss. Yikes.

Later, Brandon tells Clare that he came on the show just to be with her. She asks him what he likes about her, and he stares at her blankly before basically saying "...uh, you're hot."

Clare is not having it, and she sends his sorry butt home.

Meanwhile, Yosef reveals to the guys that he is not impressed with Clare, calling her decisions "disrespectful and classless." He's not wrong, but we all know this conversation won't go well.

Cocktail Party

Clare apologizes to Blake for rejecting him earlier and gives him the rose for being bold enough to break the rules.

She goes to make out with Dale again and the episode ends there, with Clare blissfully unaware that sh*t is about to hit the fan. No rose ceremony this week.

Quotes of the Night