Dumb Criminals Of The Week

Every morning around 6:20 I scour the Internet to find you the dumbest criminal(s) out there. Not surprisingly, criminals and common sense don’t often go hand-in-hand, so the stories are pretty easy to find. Is it a sad state of our society? Yes.  But it’s also a good laugh for the rest of us. Who made the list this of dumb criminals this week?

• First, we had a guy who robbed a bank after applying for an account and presenting the teller with two forms of ID. I’m fairly certain the bank employee was able to give police the most accurate suspect description in history, complete with photocopies of his ID.

• There was a teenager who broke into a woman’s home to steal jewelry, but couldn’t resist logging into Facebook and updating his status during the crime.  He also left the house with his account still open on her computer. This is why Facebook needs an “unlike” button.

• There was some drama in preparation of the royal wedding when a Royal Guardsman was relieved of his duties after he took to Facebook to badmouth the royal couple. When you are a royal guard at the royal wedding, calling Kate Middleton dirty words and a “stuck-up cow” probably isn't a smart move.

• We also had two California prostitutes who stole a laptop from a guy who didn’t pay his tab.  Our guy had to call police to report that to ladies of the night had stolen his laptop while he was at church.  Hello confession booth!

• And last but not least, a man in a Cow Suit who stole milk. 26 gallons of milk, that he somehow snuck past the Wal-Mart loss-prevention staff in Virginia.  Our milk bandit wandered the store on all fours in a cow costume, stole the milk, and then handed it out to random strangers outside the store.  He was arrested shortly there-after in a nearby McDonald’s parking lot. If happy cows are in California, Virginia must be home to the disgruntled cows.

See More Dumb Criminals Of The Day