Cursed Subway Sandwich Story Goes Viral on Twitter: ‘It Haunts My Nightmares’
On Twitter, a person under the username @pb_and_garlic (which sounds like a pretty questionable combo itself) told the story of the worst sandwich they were ever tasked with making during their time working at a Subway location.
"While I worked at Subway in my early twenties, I made many... questionable sandwiches. But there is one I will never forget. I think about this sandwich at least once a week. It haunts my nightmares," they began their tale of culinary terror.
The Twitter user, who goes by "Garlic," explained that at the time the employees were all in their 20s, and the Subway was being run by "kids" for an entire month when they worked there.
When a group of high school kids came into the shop one day, Garlic took the second patron's order.
First, the girl asked for a footlong with white bread — a pretty standard choice. Then she asked for double provolone and American cheese — not so uncommon. The order went downhill after the customer refused any vegetable toppings or toasting.
The person prefaced the climax of the tale with this: "Now I'm not denying people who have the taste buds of a toddler the privilege of watching your sandwich come together before your very eyes behind a curved pane of glass covered with the fingerprints and sneezes of those who came before them. They deserve Subway too."
Garlic continued: "However, this girl wanted ranch dressing. So I put ranch (two lines) on her sandwich. 'More please.' I put two more lines of ranch on her sandwich. 'More please.' I put another two lines. Her: (visibly annoyed) 'More than that.'"
"I am beginning to become concerned," they continued.
They continued adding ranch to the sandwich, to the point where the cheese had visibly disappeared under the unrelenting onslaught of thick ranch dressing.
"'Just keep going.' I stare at her, refillable squeeze bottle in hand," Garlic continued. "'You want... more than this?' Her: 'Yeah, I'll tell you when to stop.'"
At this point, as one can imagine, the dressing was "beginning to run off the sides of the bread."
"My soul exits my body as I continue to squirt ranch dressing onto her 'sandwich,'" Garlic shared. "It's more of an open-face soup at this point. I look up at her, expecting her to tell me to stop. She doesn't. She wants more."
"People with normal, human-style sandwiches [were] passing her in line" as she continued to ask for more and more ranch. The ranch saga went on for so long that they eventually ran out of dressing and had to open a brand new bottle for the customer.
"I forgot to add she did this without a trace of irony on her face. She didn't crack a smile. She didn't laugh like, 'I know this seems crazy.' She was stone faced. Serious. Deadass," they recounted, adding, "I don't know how I wrapped that thing, I must have blacked out."
After she was satisfied with the amount of ranch, the girl casually sat down with her friends and ate the monstrous sandwich. And Garlic was scarred for life.