5 Things I’m NOT Thankful For This Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is supposed to be a time to remember all the things in this world you are thankful for. I'm sure your social media feeds have been littered with countless posts of "things I'm thankful for", which is a good thing, but there are a few things I'm not Thankful for in 2013:

The Floods and Fires that ravaged Colorado.

2013 marked the biggest floods most of us have ever seen and our annual eruption of summer wildfires. I wasn't even directly affected by these disasters, but there are plenty of people that lost lives, property, belongings and piece of mind. I'm not thankful they happened.
What I am thankful for is the emergency personnel that worked (and continue to work) their butts off in those situations. As well as the wonderful acts of compassion and kindness shown by the people of this state in trying to help those that were affected by the devastation.

The Chump(s) that Stole To Noodles From That Fork Statue In Greeley

Vandalism and theft of public art are not high on my list of 'thanks'. Nobody can claim they stole the noodles to try and feed their starving family, nobody can say they were making a political statement, this was just disrespectful.

Miley Cyrus' 'Wrecking Ball Video

This song is not bad. It's lacking, somewhat, in the lyric department, but it's catchy and emotive, and people seem to love it. The video, however, is a completely different story. Four minutes of Miley, buck-naked, riding a wrecking ball and licking construction tools. It's a video I'd be embarrassed to see on TV if my parents or child were in the same room and I have no idea what in the song prompted and nudity or tool-seduction.
What I am thankful for, all the spoofs that have been done about 'wrecking ball', particularly this one from College Humor.

 The Fact the 'Selfie' and 'Twerk' Were Battling it Out to be 'Word Of The Year'

I'm not a fan of most buzz words and these two are no exception. I feel like humanity loses a couple of credibility points for making these a viable part of our language. (It also doesn't help that "twerking" led to this video.)
What I am thankful for, these two words will most-likely fall out of vogue and be forgotten in a matter of years.

Bacon Deodorant

Don't get me wrong, I love bacon, but creating a product used to cover the stinky BO of an armpit that smells like the sizzled, fatty meat of a pig is not doing anyone any favors. We may joke that we'd all love to smell like bacon all the time, but we don't really mean it.
What I am thankful for; bacon hot dogs, bacon sundaes, bacon taco shells, and bacon-just-about-everything-else.