I don’t know much about Kiefer Sutherland off screen. I’d have to do a google search to know if he’s married, has kids or whatever. One thing I DO know is that he’s taken up being a Country singer. I think that’s prime for people to make fun of. So, I did.

Getty Images for The New Yorker

Kiefer Sutherland. So many great roles on the big screen and on TV. Jack Bauer from ‘24’ ranks as one of my favorite good-guys on TV, and his new show ‘Designated Survivor’ is really good; there’s no way it would be as good with someone else in the role.  That being said…

It seems that Kiefer, like other actors, is ready to branch out to other forms of entertaining the public. He’s begun a singing career! A Country Music singing career. I see Kiefer as more of a rocker than a Country singer, but.. it’s his deal, not mine.

Where I come in, is giving examples of the heckling he may get out on the road!  I can see, being a big star, that Kiefer has a lot of ‘yes’ men telling him he’s great and everything. Once he gets out onto the road with his Country Music career, he may find that folks aren’t AS impressed, and will be letting him know as much. I’m here to prime him for the experience.

I went around the office and had staffers read my ‘Kiefer Killers’, and then pretended to be in the audience of one of his shows, delivering said zingers.

You’re welcome, Kiefer! We’ll see you out on the road!