You’d Have to Get a Third Job to Afford Eating From Gwyneth Paltrow’s Cookbook

If you haven't already heard, Gwyneth Paltrow has a new no meat, no dairy, no sugar, no wheat cookbook out called 'It's All Good.' Spoilers: it's not.

Not only does said book reduce you to eating the grass clippings from your lawnmower, but to cook from it for a day would set you back $300.

No, that's not an error, and no, you didn't just get dizzy because you've reduced yourself to a vegan, soy-free, gluten-free diet to fit into Gwyn's size 00 GOOP clothes: That says $300.

The New York Post referred to the tome as “the manifesto to some sort of creepy healthy-girl sorority with members who use beet juice rather than permanent marker to circle the ‘problem areas’ on each other’s bodies” while the Atlantic Wire called it “the bible of laughable Hollywood Neuroticism."

Still, Eater.com had the best (and by "best" we mean "worst for her") criticism, writing that the cookbook is “drenched in a chatty faux-populism ... Paltrow casually writes that she overnights homemade vegan cookies to her manager and often has a surfeit of apples from the trees on her $5.4M five-bedroom Hamptons summer home.”

We would expect nothing less from a woman whose spring essentials total $450K.

Recipes within the book call for expensive ingredients like duck eggs which cost $10 for a dozen and Manuka honey which will set you back $25 a bottle. Then there's the gluten-free flour. Gwyn suggests you get the Cup4Cup kind by celebrity chef Thomas Keller that's sold for $20 for a measly three pound bag.

The worst offenders seem to be the "Spanish Chopped Salad with Tuna" and "Piquillos With Spanish Salad Dressing" whose ingredients alone total $119.38 according to an intrepid Yahoo reporter who researched the cost of living off the 'It's So Not All Good' Gwyneth Paltrow, bankruptcy cookbook.

Which is of course assuming you buy the $32 cookbook in the first place.